Recallings

 

 

Recallings

 

She excused herself quickly from the Silver Fox’s presence and went to the bathroom. Sitting down on the closed toilet lid, she put her head in her hands. She was only here because her mother had insisted. That woman annoyed her so much, at times. This was going to be a long night.

“God, I’d kill for a cigarette,” she muttered.

 Closing her eyes, she thought back to the feel of a cigarette between her lips, the crackle of the match, the smell of sulphur and then the first deep drag into the depths of her lungs.  A gaggle of young girls came in so she flushed the toilet and emerged from the cubicle, envious of their shared camaraderie. Brushing her fingers through her dark shoulder length bob, she peered at her reflection, admiring her chocolate brown eyes but then, conscious of the fact that they were partly hidden by her hooded eyelids, she opened them wider, giving her a startled look.

Breathing deeply, she made her way to the smoking area in the hope of securing an illicit cigarette from a stranger, but everyone there was vaping. Turning around, she walked to the front of the hotel and spotted the Silver Fox again, this time in the lobby. He was leaning in towards a blonde Lady in Red. His hands were thrust deep inside his trouser suit pockets and he tilted his pelvis forward while at the same time jutting out his chest by pushing back his elbows. The lady wore an exquisite designer silk dress. Adel stole past them, leaving him with his new victim.

 Her mother would demand photographic evidence of Nancy’s daughter and her new husband so she had to wait until the first dance was over. Leaning back against a marble column, she sipped her white wine but her elbow was jostled and a little splashed on the diamante bow that she had attached to the front of the black lace dress, to make it look like a new one. The culprit was the blonde Lady in Red who had also escaped from the Silver Fox’s clutches. Apologising profusely, she insisted on buying her a glass of wine. Adel removed the soggy bow and stuffed it inside her clutch bag.

The Lady in Red returned with a bottle of Bollinger and two glasses.

“I presume you like champagne?”

Adel smiled and nodded.

They found seats at the edge of the dance floor. She had the air of someone who had always been used to great wealth, she wore it so lightly. She introduced herself, her wide smile revealing very white, even teeth.

“I’m Rebecca”

“Adel”

“Which one do you know, the bride or groom?” Rebecca queried.

“Neither. I’m here as a favour to my mom. She grew up beside Nancy, the bride’s mom back in the day. She’s at home recuperating from a minor operation and she insisted that I represent her. To be honest, I was just waiting to get a photo of the First Dance for my mother and then… home”

The band leader announced the First Dance and the happy couple took their place at the centre of the dance floor to the strains of a suitably romantic tune. Adel dutifully filmed them for a couple of minutes before re-joining Rebecca. To her dismay, the Silver Fox had taken a seat at Rebecca’s other side. If she hadn’t left her purse on the table, she would have turned around and got a taxi home. She cursed silently.

“Ah Adel, come and meet my father,” Rebecca called to her.

Adel’s eyes widened and her jaw had dropped slightly. She became aware of her reaction when Rebecca looked at her and threw her head back and laughed, a deep throaty laugh. She pulled Adel towards her and whispered,

“He was seventeen when I was born, shotgun wedding.”

Her honesty shocked Adel and she felt that she couldn’t abandon her now.

“Adel, Peter, Peter, Adel”

“We met briefly” Peter said, graciously choosing not to reveal that Adel had absconded at the bar after a five-minute conversation with him. Adel blushed. She had pegged him for a cad but perhaps she was mistaken. She swigged the remainder of her glass of champagne. The sweet bubbles tasted delicious and she felt herself becoming more relaxed. Rebecca held court, Adel and Peter drank and listened, nodding, and smiling at her anecdotes. Rebecca insisted that Adel take a selfie of the three of them. It was clear that her father adored his daughter.

“Another brownie points for Peter,” she mused.

When he asked Adel to dance, she protested that she wasn’t very good at dancing but Rebecca insisted. She followed him to the floor, he glanced to check that she was following and then he gave a little bow and placed his arm around her waist. His aftershave was subtle and pleasant. His grip was firm but gentle as he guided her around the floor. When the song was over, he placed his hand on the small of her back and they made their way back to the table. Rebecca had disappeared. Her coat and bag were gone. Adel looked quizzically at Peter and he replied,

“Classic Rebecca. She has retired for the night. No doubt James has collected her”

“James?”

“Her husband”

When he saw how bruised she looked, his voice softened and he explained,

“Rebecca is wonderful company but get too close at your own peril.”

“Gosh, he’s not very loyal,” Adel thought to herself.

“So how come someone as lovely as you are here on her own?” he continued.

She wished she could throw a glass of champagne in his ruggedly handsome face and watch it drip down on his expensive suit but she knew that she didn’t have the nerve and besides, she was afraid that the story would get back to her mother who would have fretted that she had caused a scene in front of her childhood neighbours although none of them, apart from Nancy knew Adel. He stood up and said,

“Let me get another bottle of bubbly”

She considered leaving while he was at the bar but he had returned while she was still dithering.

“You and Rebecca seem to get on really well” she observed, as he poured her a fresh drink.

“Here’s to new acquaintances” he replied, ignoring her comment.

“But do you get on well with your daughter?” she persisted.

“Once I agree with everything she says, yes” he grinned and then sipped his glass, raising his eyebrows.

“Are you still married to her mother” Adel queried.

“My, you don’t beat around the bush!”

Adel smiled. Alcohol had this effect on her.

“We met when we were seventeen. She became pregnant and I did the honourable thing and married her. We are no longer together. The End”

His words jarred.

“You have done very well for yourself.” waving her hand towards his expensive attire and the champagne.

“Wealth is wonderful,” he conceded “but if you have no-one to share it with, it loses its’ lustre. I would love someone like you as a daughter, kind and appreciative. Rebecca is neither.”

If I was your daughter, I’d say that I would be a completely different version of me, she thought and her unkind thoughts unsettled her enough to excuse herself. He held her by the wrist and squeezed, pulling her towards him,

“Hurry back, I don’t want this fine champagne to go flat,” he whispered sharply.

She smiled and nodded.

Beating a hasty retreat to the reception desk she asked the lady to call for a taxi immediately.

“It will be here in ten minutes” she was informed.

“I’ll wait outside, thank you”

Looking over her shoulder, there was no sign of Peter. The air was chilly but she was glad of it after the stuffy atmosphere and it helped clear her dizzy head. The taxi arrived and on the long journey home, she thought about how she had been drawn towards Rebecca and how her father had made her feel uneasy. Her mother had left on the yard light for her and when she closed the door behind her, she kicked off her shoes. Sinking into the armchair, she heard her mother calling. Climbing the stairs, she heard her call again. The door creaked as she opened it gently.

“Adel, how was the wedding? Show me the pictures”

“I had a good time Mom”

Adel reached inside her bag for her phone and brought up the video of the first dance. She then found the pictures of the couple and their families. Her mother scrolled through them, admiring them but then Adel noticed that she visibly paled and became very quiet. She peered over her mother’s shoulder. It was the selfie with Peter and Rebecca.

“Do you know them, Mom?”

Adel could feel the blood rushing to her ears and her mouth became dry.

“Is he, my father?” she blurted out expecting her mother to chastise her but she remained silent. A tear flowed down her cheek and she began to sniffle.

“You always told me that it was a one-night stand, that you only knew his first name, that he was only passing through” Adel’s voice trembled.

“And that was the truth, Adel but he returned a short time later and when Vanessa Nealon became pregnant, her family forced him to marry her.”

“It wasn’t a hard task because of their wealth” she added, picking at the threads of her candlewick bedspread. “I was a nobody; your father would never have married me. I did everyone a favour and left for the city. I got a job in an office and I went to the Nuns just before you were due. I found a day nursery and was able to return to work when you were a few weeks old.”

“You were never a nobody, mom. Does Peter even know about me?”

“No, there was no point in telling him. He hooked up with Vanessa and before I knew it, they were married. That’s why I never return to ValleyLanders, too many painful memories. I kept in touch with Nancy, she was the only one I could trust. My family were relieved with my decision to stay away, the neighbours’ opinions were more important than their granddaughter. Now that I’m older I realise that my parents were of a time when being unmarried and pregnant was a mortal sin, a sin that could never be erased or forgotten, it was a fate worse than death.”

The whirring of the seconds on the alarm clock filled the silence.

“Would you like to meet Peter again, Mom?”

“What did you think of him, Adel?” her mother countered.

“He was clearly very wealthy and he was charming but very smug and self-opinionated. I left him when he said that he did the honourable thing by marrying his pregnant girlfriend. It sounded so hollow and self-righteous. If it’s alright with you, I would prefer if we never again had anything to do with him or his daughter. You made the right choice all those years ago, mom, it was YOU who did the honourable thing. I love you.”

Her mother smiled and held her hand,

“You are enough Adel. You have always been enough. Many poor mothers had to give up their babies for adoption, they did not have the financial means to keep them. I was blessed.”

She kissed her daughter on the cheek.

“I’m exhausted love. Go to bed and we will talk again in the morning”

Her mother turned over, drawing the duvet tightly around her. Memories of that night came unbidden to her tired mind. His swagger, his piercing eyes, his lingering aftershave. She had cursed herself for believing his sweet, empty words but now she recognised it for what it really was, a deluded young woman, looking for love when she was struggling to love herself. Gratitude warmed her now as she thought of how she had not only survived but thrived and then her thoughts turned to the unbreakable bond of love between herself and her girl.

 Her daughter’s phone pinged as she left the room. It was an unknown number.

“I know who you are”

“Who is this? “Adel typed.

“Your half-sister”

Adel shivered. Growing up, she had longed for a sister; someone to play catch with, someone to go cycling with, someone to watch cartoons with but as she grew into adulthood, she was more than happy with her own company. Peter and Rebecca were in a completely different league to herself and her mother. They had never struggled financially; they had never stood at an ATM hoping that it wouldn’t read “Insufficient Funds” when they tried to withdraw cash or hoped that their card would not be declined when out shopping. Their life of plenty had made them egotistical and imperious.

“How do you know?” Adel asked.

“My husband gave me a genealogy DNA test for my birthday and you popped up”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I wanted to suss you out. Stay away from me. Stay away from my father. He doesn’t know.”

“With pleasure” Adel replied and she blocked Rebecca’s number.

She padded back into her mother’s room. Kissing the top of her head, she silently vowed to never again take her for granted and to always remember the strong, independent mother with whom she had been blessed.

 

Mary Walsh Foley

Mary’s work has appeared in Confetti, Ireland's Own. Ireland's Eye, From the Well Anthology and was a prize winner in the Maurice Walsh short story competition.